I Burst My Eye Blood Vessels

What a week it's been!

Hi friend,

I type this on Friday, 8 days after my surgery when I’m cleared to work a bit.

But I’m not entirely comfortable with over an hour of laptop time yet. So since the newsletter takes 40min, here I am.

What a week it’s been!

The Surgery

My LASIK was a quick surgery.

35 seconds of laser time and under 2 minutes of ‘surgery time’ per eye.

But yours truly was super anxious! Especially because you also lose vision for a few seconds which set me into panic mode.

I mean, won’t you panic if you go blind for 5 seconds?

When one eye got over and we took 2 minutes before we hopped onto the other one, I realised how tensed my entire body was.

The Aftermath

The surgery was for my eyes, but my gut suffered. LOL.

I got nausea. The journey 50m back home wasn’t easy because I was so uncomfortable.

Once we got home, I fell sick.

I got diarrhoea + vomiting. The doctor told my mum it was because I was super anxious during the surgery.

FYI, this is such a straightforward example of how anxiety can screw you physically.

The Beloved Blood Vessels

It’s not as dramatic as it sounds, I promise.

I just vomited with way too much pressure. I actually did feel pressure in my temples (if thats related in any case). The next day during my review the doctor saw blood clots.

I didn’t see it, because I couldn’t even open my eyes without the stinging sensation. I only started ‘seeing’ on the evening of Day 2.

Luckily, nothing was around the surgical area.

Right now, 80% of clots have dissolved. And it didn’t hurt or anything.

The World is Clear!

For the first time in 20 years, I can wake up and see. But on most days I still find my specs… Old habits die hard, you know.

Everything is so, so clear.

There isn’t a pair of heavy specs resting on my nose. I’m not blinking too much to lubricate my lenses.

It feels so good, really.

I just find the sun too bright but I’m excited to start heading out soon.

What I Didn’t Enjoy

• I missed working.

• Today that I can work (a little), I don’t want to work.

• I was REALLY distracted.

• I got so bored. There’s only so much you can read and watch.

• Waking up but not working out/ working made my mornings bleh.

In a way, I feel I’ve failed the mindfulness practice I’ve been cultivating for 3 years. I constantly desired stimulation because it’d feel like so much time has passed by but it’d only be 9:30 am.

Maybe I’m overthinking this.

(Overthinking is my second side hustle ;) )

Last

I understand that this newsletter was more about me, in fact, all about me.

I will get back to writing across platforms slowly.

Also, if you don’t already know I also have a weekly newsletter called ‘Side Hustle Saturdays’. It’s free and goes to all those who’ve got a copy of my Side Hustler’s Checklist.

The 4th issue will be out on Saturday 7 pm IST :)

PS - My course, Summit 21, has 6 spots left and starts in 45 days. So exciting!

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See you next week.

I appreciate you devoting a fraction of your time to me.

Love,

N