I’m Being Choosy. And You?
4-minute read
Hi friend,
I’m typing this on a Friday evening. The usual heat is replaced by clouds, the trees in front of me are swaying and it just stopped drizzling.
I’m also typing this with my family in my room.
An atmosphere filled with warmth and a heart full of gratitude, indeed.
Today I want to speak to you about this hack I don’t see many people using. If they did, they’d probably be happier.
We have a choice, you know?
Lately, I’ve been exercising this choice on who I surround myself with.
For a while, I’ve closed doors to any and all surface-level ‘friends’. I’ve become more comfortable with saying no instead of being a yes-woman or saying yes and throwing an excuse later.
Why is it wrong when you choose who to surround yourself with?
Why is it rude to not be friends with the world?
Why is it glorified to be social and party?
This is stupid. And winners already know it’s stupid.
It’s not about being social or not being social, introvert vs extrovert vs ambivert - it’s about shamelessly doing what makes you feel good. It’s about listening to your gut when you don’t feel it’s the right thing to do.
It’s easy to sense energy once you’re mindful and aware.
Not everybody is your mate. And if you feel there are people who bring down your vibe, let them be. Energy vampires are totally real and existent!
“Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.” – Prov 4:23 (NLT)
We have a choice to choose how we feel.
I’ve spoken about ‘outcome detachment’ to over 8 people in the last few days.
As a writer, once I hit publish, it’s over for me.
I’m not going to bother my head about why didn’t something I put so much heart into get traction, or why did a random piece of content go viral. I simply focus on writing and moving on to the next piece.
Why be so focussed on the outcome when you can enjoy the process?
Won’t attaching yourself to the outcome make the process stressful?
Play to play, work to work, paint to paint. While goals are great and necessary, getting affected by outcomes is a recipe for disaster.
You have zero control over the consequences, so it’s dangerous to be affected by something you cannot control.
What you can control is your emotional response and building your strength. :)
"Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see a shadow." - Helen Keller
I want you to think about something you can actually choose, but you’re unknowingly not choosing the happier route.
Maybe you’re choosing to stress out about imaginary worst-case scenarios.
Maybe you’re choosing to overthink what a mean colleague said at work.
Maybe you’re choosing to dwell in your childhood trauma.
Whatever it is, choose the better side. Because there’s almost ALWAYS a choice. Feel bad, but choose to get over it. Feel hurt, but choose to take a path towards healing.
It all starts with an active intention to be joyful and take charge of your happiness.
“Joy is a natural phenomenon. Misery is your creation.” - Sadhguru
Thats it for this week, friends.
I hope this newsletter made you think.
I also have a newsletter called Side Hustle Saturdays. It’s all about side hustling and the creator economy.
The 12th issue will be out this Saturday. Just grab my free Side Hustler’s Checklist to receive it in your inbox.
See you next week!
Love,
N